May 2013
me: i'm just going to rest my eyes for 5 minutes.
me: wakes up march 27th, 2098.
falloutyoungmale:
I write sins not five page research papers
stuartsometimes:
I’m not a morning person
I’m not even an afternoon person
I pretty much start functioning at about 6pm
jesuschristvevo:
i want to blow up my school but i dont want to get in trouble u feel me
twistedviper:
whorusszahhak:
perfectionistdia:
whorusszahhak:
don’t ever take me on a date to an aquarium because i will ignore you and spend the whole time looking at the fish
But, if you think about it, that’s all the more reason to go. The person you’re dating gets to sit back and watch you smile and have fun. All the while, he/she’s falling deeper in love with you.
thatS REALLY...
lolsebastian69:
so i took a thermometer and went to the bathroom and stood in front of the toilet with the thermometer in my hands and screamed and then yelled “i’m pregnant” in exasperation so my mom came running and snatched the thermometer from my hands and then she realized it was a thermometer
fetusich:
my life is a constant cycle of waiting until the weekend and then not doing anything when it comes
overhearing a conversation between strangers in which they’re saying something completely wrong and you really feel like correcting them
geometricdeathtrap:
metallikato:
generallegendary:
metallikato:
jewelstaites:
how to give a good handjob
bop it
pull it
twist it
harder
better
faster
stronger
You pull your left hand in You pull your left hand out You pull your left hand in And you shake it all about!
Cha cha real smooth
none of you ever touch a penis
normal people: one episode per night
me: one season per night
rneerkat:
whens chip skylarks next tour
That awkward moment when you're in class and the...
laugh-addict:
And you’re just sitting there hoping she doesn’t call on you
via sodamnrelatable
me: i think i already reblogged this
me: did i already reblog this
me: i totally already reblogged this
me: ah who cares i'm reblogging it again
